Wednesday, October 26, 2005
one more week, one more week and i'll be left with one less subject to mug for a-levels.. time is running real short.. i can sense the urgency.. i can feel the stress building up.. but so what if i know? so what if i try to study? whatever that i try to input in my mind just leaves automatically a while later.. i feel so useles.. so stupid.. i can still score badly for papers even until now.. the only hope i have is only lep.. but i'm really scared that the more i expect/hope, the greater will be my disappointment next year.. i don't have full confidence even for lep.. ah.. i'm really worried.. i'm really scared.. but yet there're so many a times when i just feel so drained mentally and i can only seek solace in sleep which is a luxury now!!! haiz.. i guess i'll still go back to mug my brain out after this.. i think i just need to vent out.. sometimes i'll be so hard on myself i can't do anything except feel trapped and cry.. but thankfully i have people i can sms to and ask them to call me then they'll call me almost immediately. i can destress and pick myself up yet again after listening and talking to them.. thanks shell and boonie! i made it past last weekend without going crazy thanks to you two.. fengyi also! talking to you made me get over the sadness and shadow of last saturday.. i'm just thankful that i'm surrounded with people who cares a lot despite not knowing exactly what i'm experiencing.. i'll hold on de.. =)
8:13 AM
