Yesterday was another day when I witnessed an accident that left me rather shaken at the end. I was supposed to meet my rag friends after my tuition job at Plaza Singapura to go watch the rag & flag exhibition and support our arts dancers. As I was personally involved in arts rag thus I wasn’t able to watch the dances of all the other faculties and halls on rag day itself. Thus my eyes were just glued to the dances and performances as I see them for the 1st time. I did not expect pow to be there initially, it was a pleasant surprise for me when I see her running out together with her law rag dancers when it was their turn to showcase their dance. I was even anticipating as I’ve never watched her stunts before despite hearing a lot about them from her. It all went on smoothly until the 3-men tier…actually I already got a bad feeling before she did this stunt as I saw her facial expression for the earlier easier stunt…it all happened too quickly…I just saw her fall to the ground…I did not know how to react or respond at 1st…I guess I was also in shock…after a short while, I heard a voice in me telling me that I should go and see how she was…she is my close friend and I believe I have a right to be with her when she is like this…I feel that she needs someone she knows well to be with her telling her everything’s fine…I ran to the place where she is being laid down but she is being surrounded by a lot of people and I couldn’t reach her…I felt so helpless…she looked very scary initially…her eyes staring blankly into space and blood trickling from her mouth…I was scared…very scared…I almost lose myself and cried…I am so worried that she will suffer some very serious injuries…I don’t even know what I am thinking at that moment…finally after a long while, I managed to squeeze my way to beside her and it was then that I felt better…being able to hold on to her hand and talk to her…it really calmed me down a lot…but deep down in my heart I am still very much worried…

After the ambulance arrived, one of her law seniors accompanied her on the ambulance thus I was made to take a taxi to Singapore General Hospital. I couldn’t get a taxi right in front of PS as it is a bus lane so have to run all the way to the taxi stand further in. I wasn’t able to get a taxi initially and that really unsettled me like hell…but thankfully I was able to catch a taxi by cutting other people’s queue I think…I am sorry to the people I grabbed the taxi from…so I reached the hospital not long after the ambulance reached…then it came the long waiting period which I endured by praying hard deep in my heart for pow to be safe and sound…I stayed on all the way til she slept for the day…I am so thankful she is fine already!!! Powrabbit, you gave us all a scare! You must take care of yourself and get well as soon as possible ok? You’ve been through the worst so whatever comes in the near future shall be only good luck and not bad!!! J

I’ve been through two traumatizing accidents this year…haha…very eventful ya? I just hope and pray that there won’t be a third one!!! My heart cannot take anymore such things liao… I’ll most probably faint straightaway if the third one ever happens! Now just wish that the memory of the incident will fade quickly with time…

Sometimes I just wish that I am all alone living in this world.. I don't have to answer to anyone with regards to what I do.. I don't have to bother about what other people think.. I don't have to care about what other people feel.. I don't have to do anything to satisfy other people.. I don't know.. I am talking nonsense already.. I think I'm starting to feel the immense stress of university life.. haha.. I think I'm just exaggerating also.. aiya.. I really don't know what I am talking about liaoz.. I am just stressed.. University life is fun I have no doubts about it! But.. I'm scared that I'll have to face much more stuff which I'm not mentally prepared for to handle.. I am a worry freak.. Don't bother about me, don't bother about this post.. I just need to let out some frustrations I guess.. Argh.. I am so so so sorry.. Not talking sense liaoz.. Shall stop here.. Paiseh.. Haiz.. Don't worry, I'll pick myself up again soon!!! :)

hey hey hey~!!! updates finally after such a long long long time!!! now I am currently sitting on the floor of perk point in NUS central library! hahaha, super comfortable, got air-conditioning and then super nice cushion sofa. I am going to spend a lot of my future 3/4 years in NUS at the central library mugging!!! it is really a very conducive environment for studying, reading and researching! Okok, enough about praising my new school and back to blogging~! ;)

hmmm.. actually it feels quite weird to be back in school again after such a long time, I guess a lot of other people will also agree with me. The girls after working for about half a year and the boys after being in army for two years, it certainly feels uneasy to be back in school to study. For me after doing relief teaching at Anderson Secondary School, I was already very much mentally prepared to go directly to NIE to complete my degree in teaching and just continue teaching. BUT, I know it is definitely not a very sensible or rationale move given due considerations to my future career opportunities and stuff, thus I am back in school to gain more knowledge! Hahaha. One thing I have to say, studying at the university level is definitely very much different from any other levels of education I have been through personally. The very obvious difference is that people no longer wears school uniform to go to school! And then the second thing is that you can be classmates with people who are much much much older than you! Also, in university, your previous education background doesn’t matter anymore. Whether you are from junior college or polytechnic, whether you have been a high scorer or a repeat student once/twice, it feels the same with everyone. It makes me really wonder why in the past we used to take all these things so seriously when in university it no longer matters, I give up thinking as I cannot find any reasonable explanation.

Finally a university student myself.. the feeling is rather surreal.. it is rather unbelievable even! I mean in the past I used to think that university is like a place I will never be able to even step into. But now I am actually studying in university!!! Oh man, it really feels like I am in a dream! Initially I felt very emotional as I thought of how my ah gong used to ask me to study hard so that can get into university and then in future got job so that wont suffer. I think my ah gong will be really proud of me if he can see how and where I am now. J being in university is going to be a big challenge, with the people you need to face everyday, the modules you have to take, the decisions and arrangements you have to decide and plan for yourself…etc. I am in a relatively good and high mood now but it certainly wasn’t the case for the last few days as I battle with a lot of issues and thought about a lot of things…but, do not worry for me as I will always be able to sort out my thoughts and self-console myself effectively. I know that the world is never fair, the society is harsh, cruel and practical and that life is never a bed of roses! Hahaha, this is part of growing up~ I don’t want to grow up but it is not within my control so what I can only do is to learn to deal with it. Learn how to grow up without falling down too many times unnecessarily or bumping into too many walls when there is no need to.

i am pissed!!! i just typed for almost an hour long and because of a moments carelessness at pressing the wrong things on my keyboard, everything is gone!!! argh.. i want to cry liaoz.. suan le.. i guess it is heaven's wish that i shall not blog about what has already happened. haiz.. ok la, i shall just conclude ba.. i have been living a very fulfilling life doing a lot a lot a lot of things and going to many many many events and places!!! i have seen and experienced much too~ i am still doing fine so no worries to those who are wondering what has happened to me. paiseh that i did not blog but i have been real busy and shagged.. i will try and update on my blog de. but i guess it will be school reopen before i really hava time to myself? haha.. okok.. everyone take care ya? live life to the fullest and enjoy it when you can because you never know it you can live to see the next sunrise iseneh? :) wishing everyone all the best for whatever they are doing and do stay in touch~! :D til i next blogged, cya~