wahahaha, i just came back from a wedding dinner of my 2 collegues back in anderson, was really very touched and happy that they extended invitation for me to join them in this biggest event of their whole life~! went down straight after my evening social work paper, chiong all the way man. hectic hectic but also fun as i end up chatting with the taxi uncle once more. i have this habit liao, haha. taxi uncles are nice and great people to talk to really. ;)

anyway back to the wedding dinner, it was held at maritus mandarin hotel and the whole atmosphere was super duper nice and romantic!!! goodness! the whole thing is so magical and both the bride and bridesgroom were so pretty and handsome! so much like fairytale stories where they have the happily ever after lovely ending!!! haha, really so so so chio that i suddenly have impulse to get married!!! haha, but it is a stupid impulse so it is just say say. i wont get married until at least 4 years later la!!! how can you get married without being attached first? siao! haha, so that is my plan. actually i think wedding so long it is with someone you love, with people who love you surrounding you and doing things for you, it is blissful and beautiful already. when will i have my wedding? maybe never because i may just be a spinster! muahahaha. singlehood rocks~ for now, i just want my life to be me, studies, arts club, friends and families, no place for a him. as for HIM, haha.. i duno also.. just wishing him all e best every day from e bottom of my heart? love is blind.. but i will still choose bread over love...

just remembered something which is funny and sad at the same time.. haha, remember i cut my hair super short back to my old style? i just recalled the different treatments some people give me when long hair and when short hair!!! haha, super drastic somemore. super duper obvious. of course it is people of the opposite gender, very sad hoh? so superficial, but cant blame them also. haha, actually feel that it is a blessing in disguise because i no need to entertain them anymore, on msn and on phone. so should i grow long hair again? i dont know leh, see how 1st loh, see my mood by that time, muahaha. ^-^

hahahahahahahaha!!! yea yea yea!!! i am feeling so so so so so happy!!! woohooo!!! my efforts paid off man!!! yea man!!! wahahahahaha, so so so so so exhilarated sia! yea yea yea! haha, i got 80/100 for my level2000 film n history gem module essay!!! i was very scared when i know that i have to collect the paper initially one.. really very worried because i really have no confidence with myself in terms of academic wise. glad that i did very well!!! haha, also must thank you very very very (to the power of infinity) much to a great senior of mine paul who helped me brainstorm on ideas and edit my totally english cannot make it essay. if not for him, my A for that essay is a dream never to be realised!!! haha, just want to share my happiness and that everything is possible so long as you put your mind, heart and soul into it so never say die or give up ok? let's all jia you to become better person mentally, physically and intellectually! yea man, to all those still having exams like me, let's all mug hard! do it to the best of our abilities so that we will not regret and can be proud of ourselves for what we've been able to accomplish! yep yep, everyone take care too~! tata!!! (:

haha, just feel ike penning some of my thoughts with regards to my CCA in university which is the NUS Students' Arts and Social Sciences Club!!! haha, i got the full name correct~ ;) trying to stir shit here, no offence ok? :P actually i can say i feel strongly (both fortunate and unfortunate) for my decision to run and e part of the 27th Management Committee. fortunate in the sense that it really opened up my eyes a lot with regards to human resource management and facts plus ways of life. i have really seen a lot ever since i stepped up as the deputy welfare director cum director of service cum assistant honourary treasurer. after being through around 2 months of MC life, seen so much stuff going on, came into contact with so many different types of people, i have learnt a lot of things i will never be able to do so in textbooks or lecture notes.

i am very blessed to be able to have so many seniors that really care for me from the bottom of my heart. they are always so ready to listen to me and help me whenever i need them to... to the extent that i feel really super duper paiseh to ask them for help or tell them about troubles i am experiencing because i seriously do not want to worry them about my own things. i also have great respect for a lot of them, for what they teach, for what they believe and for what they hope to pass down onto us. i salute all of them, they rock my life. shall not list them down because i do not want to have missed out any single one because it will be damn bad and they wont be able to know even if i put their names down so no point la, heez. ^-^

but, i also see a lot of things in life. the beautiful picture that my parents painted for me about life and people will totally smashed and there were times when i just lose hope in everything... even in life... because i find no meaning in me living on each day and wasting resources where other people can make use of it more economically-effective. i will just miss my friends in primary school, secondary school, jc and all the seniors and juniors plus my already deceased grandpa... especially my grandpa... i will deep down pray hard that he will just come one day and bring me together with him. haha, dont worry la, i wont die! muahahaha, but i have to agree there are bouts of depression and i will lose all hope in life.. haha.. for now it has been ok again? haha.. i duno how long it will last but no matter what, i will live on. at least until after my one year in mc because i oredi promised to serve e arts students population and they voted me in so i cannot be so irresponsible and leave all these things. i also cannot be so irresponsible as to leave all my friends and people close to my heart in the lurch. i cannot bring myself to do that when i can think rationally. haha, therefore i wont commit suicide or quit MC so long as i am sane!!! :)

then i am going to take up a huge tasks which will only make me more busy than now, make me realise more things about myself (both strengths and weaknesses), see more shit in this world and maybe become even more depressed or sadistic or unfeeling than now.. i am going to run for the project director of a super massive project.. i was very unsure of this decision... i was very paranoid of this choice... i was very afraid of what i will have to deal with... but i guess i do not want to live with regrets and i want to challenge myself, really push myself to the limit and see if i can live up to it. after MC, maybe i can change my focus in life to be my future students. ok den, it is getting late already. shall stop here and may all things go well for me especially my exams!!! haha, hopefully i can become a teaching scholar by the end of this year? yea man, tomorrow will be a better day! hope is always there, see the light at the end of the tunnel!!! :D

wahahahahaha!!! finally something that really makes me happy to the power of infinity in nus~! hahahahaha, i am so so so so so exhilarated!!! hahahaha, yea man, wooohoooo~~~ hahaha, finally i can fulfil my promise and talk about something really good! and finally i feel that i am a student in nus!!! i am studying!!! i am fulfilling my responsibility as a student in nus!!! haha, pardon all the exclamation marks to come because i am sincerely very glad! haha, actually i am also close to crying ba.. haha, tears of joy. this is because i never dream that i will actually be able to see A grade on my paper ever again, especially after my A-less A-level certificate.. i guess my confidence level was damn low.. i was just praying for a pass and if possible only a B.. i totally no confidence in my work, in myself, in whatever things i am doing.. it was really affecting me a lot.. i guess this attributes partly to my low bouts of depression since start of school in nus also. after seeing everyone aiming for As, i also hope to get those grades intensely deep in my heart, but i do not dare to be too hopeful for fear of facing another huge slap of disappointment in the face again.. haha, but now i am starting to be hopeful about my study life in nus already! i can do it de! i must aim high because i can do it! i must believe in myself. i must work hard towards my goal. i believe i can fly... (: