My 1st singing competition ever!!! OMG OMG OMG... I made it to the finals last weekend with my friend Si Ting, a Masters (Chinese Language) student in PKU from NUS. The finals is this coming Friday!!! And we need to sing 3 songs once again! Oh my tian. Faints. Need to remember all the lyrics, plus dance moves, and any other details. Last but not least clothes! I did not even bring much, have no idea how we going to even dress up for the songs.

Singing Chinese version of Under the Sea so need to help choreograph a little moves to go along with the song, thankfully I brought along my Rag 2007 dance video along if not totally no idea. But it is nevertheless hard as need to make sure it suits the song parts, and that it is not too difficult to be learnt and coordinated within a few days.

Going to really let down my hair together with my partner & just enjoy ourselves. Praying earnestly that everything goes well and we do not screw things up. Wish me luck!!! :P

1. As audio recording technology has not been invented until recent years, there is no way we can find out exactly how the Chinese words we learn now is being pronounced in the past. But this does not mean that we give up like this, thus the researchers and academics scout through tons of ancient books to find all the evidences they need to lead to the most plausible theory of what the word means and how it is being pronounced.


2. A lot of people have the misconception that scriptures are very sacred and thus untouchable unless you are ready to indulge yourself into the spiritual world. But the case is that a lot of Buddhist scriptures are just describing the life of people practising Buddhism and their stories. So it can be read just like any other books, just that the language may be a bit hard to understand.
   
3. The Chinese paintings of things were used solely for the purpose of decoration initially in the past, it was only at a later time period when people start to emphasize on the artistic aspect and view it as an art like what we know now.

Normally people will want to succeed things that have been done before, want to do things better, make things greater. And if possible, achieve things that people said impossible earlier. It instills a wonderful sense of accomplishment when you really did it, makes one feel euphoric and fantastic. Thus they may feel that tradition is not as good, tradition is restricting, tradition should just be a thing in history not real life. As a result, we have read about earth-shattering historical moments when people want to remove tradition completely out of people's life.

I have to say I do agree to some extent, but not absolutely. As mentioned before, I believe those earth-shattering historical moments did have their pros. The people did benefit in some way, the society did progress somehow or rather, things did change. But along with them, the cons seemed to have a long-lasting negative impact.

Tradition may not be a good thing, it may stop us from being creative and coming up with new things that could improve our lives and the way we do things. But it doesnt mean to throw it away totally, ignoring it completely, stereotyping everything with it as negative.

If you cannot come up with a better way of doing things as yet, or have tried other methods which do not seem to work, why not just stick with the good old ways? It is very tiring to always try to think of new ways to do things just because you dont want to follow the old way. If following the old way has more to gain and nothing to lose than not doing it, why not just follow tradition?

Passion in whatever you are doing. I used to believe strongly in that. I was still convinced by people and things I see previously to have a little faith still in that. But now... I think it is hard to stick by it anymore.

Having experienced it personally, be it for my future occupation, or in the activities which I engaged in. Having seen so many people being through the same process as me, with the passion level dying slowly (or rapidly, even exponentially sometimes) as time passes by. Having observed people who think that they are still doing things with passion, but have distorted themselves to become no more the person they were before. Having witnessed people whom I thought may be abnormalies coming back to become conventional.

This can get pretty depressing at times. But I guess when we have decided to do something, especially if it covers over quite a long period, there must be more incentives and motivations which you find out for yourself, balancing both the practical and spiritual sides. Tipping the balance in anyway is not going to get you far, me thinks...

A book that really touched me very much. Tuesdays with Morrie written by Mitch Albom. It is really very inspiring and mind-opening. I have never ever felt so moved by reading a book before. This book easily brought me to tears with the story and the words used. Maybe it reminded me of my past grandfather, brought back all the memories and along with them the regrets I have always kept deep inside me. This book brought everything out in front of me, and I just cannot control my emotions. It is really a great book, if you have spare time while on public transport or during weekend, read it and I am sure you would not regret. :)

1. In Chinese language, it may be the same for other languages but I am not very sure so shall not comment here, similar or even identical words can have absolutely different meanings that are imposed due to the context or environment in which they are in. So, speak and write with care and after much thought if you do not want to have communication breakdown.
   
2. The H*nyu P*nyin which we nowadays use was something which was passed down to us from Ch*na after all the proper legislative and administrative procedures have been done. It is unlike the general misconception of being initiated by W*estern countries. It was put in place to help the kids in Ch*na to master their common Chinese language better, and also to help the people from other dialect areas to master the common Chinese language better and faster.
   
3. A lot of language rules, principles or guidelines put in place by the academics with regards to Chinese Language is far from being perfect and all encompassing. As the use of language is constantly adapting and there are always abnormal uses that people commonly use, there will always be new theories, be it improved or creative ones. Thus a lot of things which we learn, especially at the tetiary level, is susceptible to change. But, change is the only constant afterall. ;)
   
   

Missing home? More like the people inside and those close in uni. I do not exactly miss the lifestyle in N*S which I have back home. I do not exactly want to go back to the days where my days are filled with so many things I do not know which to do first or which to even do. I am also not so keen to be back in the many whirlpools which will need me to calm them down. So in a sense, this exchange is like an escapede. Haha, running away doesnt solve anything in the long run, but taking a temporary break so as to walk a longer distance's definitely what I need.

I am really fortunate in a lot of sense, feeling that a lot of times during my 5 weeks plus exchange experience here. I have a group of friends here whom I can always look to if I were to have any problems at P*U. I have sufficient funding which means I do not really need to be thrifty but I am not living like a queen as need to save up for backpacking at the end. I have a cousin whose words never fail to fill me up with much strength and optimism. I have managed to get in touch with my religion after so long, and even attained a newer level of understanding which allowed B*ddhism to be an even stronger emotional support for me. I have MSN, and all the friends that allow me to still stay in touch with things. Plus, I have phone calls from the people whom I really cannot let my mind off of.

I must admit there are moments when I feel a pang of homesick-ness but they dont last long because I do not come here on exchange to miss home! And I agree what Xiu Wen said also. The people are on our mind, but need not always be on the conscious side, it can also be on the subconscious side! :))) I am learning, studying, working, enjoying, relaxing...

Officially went shopping finally!!! Haha, for those who have talked to me about it before, they would have known that I only packed 4 T-shirts (grey, green, yellow & red) plus 2 jeans for my exchange. Yep, your eyes did not fool you, that is how light I packed. AND, after more than 5 weeks of rotating between the same few T-shirts, I decided to buy new clothes. :P

Yea man, and so went to the Chinese and bigger version of Bugis Street in China called 五道口服装市场. I must say there are a lot a lot of shops there and much variety too! But as the weather has not yet obviously turned warmer, most of the clothes are still not suitable for spring/summer. And as I sweat super easily, those clothes are simply big NONO for me. But in the end did manage to buy some nice clothes.

Loved bargaining! Hehehe, it is always a nice way to end your day when you know you bought your stuff for a good bargain. Little things in life that makes you happy. Also made me realised how cheap the clothes actually are, and how much vendors actually earn if you buy without bargaining. More shopping in the next few weeks! This is a promise to myself~ Muahahaha.

Just felt like doing a shoutout to the following people who made me feel so blessed on my exchange!!!

Mei Ling! Thank you for your ArtBox organiser! I am using it every single day & I really love the format of the book. And I just realised not long ago that you actually wrote a small note for me on the book, heh. :P

Liting (pork)! Thank you for your USB-connected cup warmer! Really warms my cup and is a great thing to have in this cold weather! And it's my favourite blue colour! Plus your nice little message on the box gave me a nice surprise when I opened it up. ;)

Doris! Thank you for your rose tea bags! Even though I have not started drinking it yet, looking at it just feels me with your love without my control! I will drink it as I look at the spring views from my window. :)

Kai Wei! Thank you for your emails that keeps me updated on how things are going back in Singapore! Always looking forward to your mail when I checked my gmail inbox wor! Haha, it is ok not to reply promptly as both of us have other things on hand de ya?

Sandra! That little shoutout on your blog is just so sweet!!! Mummy misses you much too! Take care lotsa back in NUS and balance your workload well kk? Jiayou!! ^-^

Min Joo & Xiu Wen! Thank you for keeping me updated about how things are going on at your side! Plus always not forgetting to ask me about things on my side also. Even though we may not be in the same area on the same country, it still feels like you two are near me. :)))

My family! The weekly phone call is something which I will always look forward to, it made me feel at home for those few moments. I have learnt to cherish the short time a lot.

Xin Yu's still afraid of her stupid dark corridors but at the same time feeling super loved and blessed on her exchange!!! Everyone take care wherever you are and whatever you are doing~

北大语言、文学、文化通选课（二）

1. Buddhism did not originate from China even though it may seem to all of us it radiates from there. Buddhism originated from India, spread to the Middle Eastern countries which act as the middleman, and then from there to China eventually.
   



2. The Confucius' teachings which we are exposed to nowadays may not be what it was meant to be in the 1st place. A lot of times, the words spoken by him has been taken out of context to suit the purpose in which they are included. So if you want to understand them completely, you really need to study them properly.
   
   


3. There is a difference between the way Western world and Eastern world looks at things and how they work. In here, I shall narrow them down to the English and the Chinese. The English tend to theorise and give reason to things they do and observations they make, making everything a study more or less. But the Chinese tend to find ways to make things work and record down the observations, then look at the big picture from there. E.g. in medicine, Westerners look at where it is painful, find a reason why it is painful and cure it; Easterners look out for any other symptoms to lead to the main cause, solve it from there and then record it as it is.

Community Involvement Programmes Overseas!!!

And so, I did my ever first CIP in China yesterday at a residential place. It serves as a place for babies with handicap to recuperate and recover before they are put up for adoption. Even though the journey to and fro was almost 3hrs, being with the babies for the short 1hr plus was totally worth it for me.

There were in total 6 babies inside the house when we reached. Some having done their surgery and others waiting for their turn. The babies usually have cleft lips, resulting in them having difficulty eating and even breathing at times. There is also one with heart problem, and another with spinal cord problem. Other than those with cleft lips, the other babies look just like any healthy baby outside.

Looking at them, I cannot help but feel like giving all I can to just make them happy, secure and comfortable during my short stay there. I tended to every single baby as much as I can, and to those that are too young to move about on their own much, I carried them and coo-ed them. It is always a wonderful feeling to carry a baby in your arms.

There is this baby that keeps staring at my hands and fingers while I moved them, giving me the impression that she must be wondering how come hers are so small and mine so gigantic. There is this baby that fell asleep within seconds of me stroking her forehead, one moment she's awake and the next she's gone to the world. I felt like I did some magic on her, it is a feeling beyond words. There is this baby that starts frowning and making small whining sounds when I put him down to carry other babies, probably getting jealous. :P

I am looking very much forward to seeing the babies once again! Even though my stay there might not have made a significant and obvious impact in their life, I cannot help but feel that it did make a little difference to their little hearts and minds. If I ever stop teaching in future, the other job I will readily go into is baby care. :)))

Fei Xin (飞信), Xiao Nei (校内) and VeryCD

I have come across these three things in China upon exchange, and it really amazes me. Shall share with you all how up to technology the teenagers here are, actually on the same level as us (maybe even better!), just that their language of medium is in Chinese.



Fei Xin: this is something like a MSN messenger window, except that, you send out sms-es to handphones, when the other party doesnt use Fei Xin or when the other party is not online. If the other party is online, tadah! It's another MSN messenger. So how does it work exactly? Someone using Fei Xin will enter his/her friend's number so that he/she can be added to your sms list, the other party (who doesnt have Fei Xin) has to reply positive for this thing to work.

So long as you are on China Mobile, be it what types of smaller variation you belong to, you can enjoy the benefits and conveniences this software brings. So the CCAs here will all have their Fei Xin accounts which they can mass sms to their members for free. And one more plus point is that when people reply to Fei Xin it's also free!!! So good right? Imagine the amount of sms you can save! And I can even sms Xiu Wen & Min Joo, who are at Shanghai now, as and when freely! ;) Save money, me likes lots lots!



Xiao Nei: this is the Chinese version of Facebook to put it simply, except that everything's in Chinese and they have the necessary school information of not just those in China but all over the world as well! I was really amazed to be able to find NUS when they wanted me to input my tetiary education institution. They have the schools from all over the world, seriously. (Maybe Facebook also have but I never go explore :P)

The differences is that it may not be as user-friendly (or maybe I have not explored enough to discover all the convenient shortcuts), but sometimes we do get the feeling that Facebook is also like that with all the major turnover changes these days. They have more interactive things on it, like rearing dogs online and it is an animated dog, not just some doggy picture taken. Maybe I can look to having a network of China friends in PKU! Who knows right?



VeryCD: last but certainly not least, the website that allows me to download virtually all sorts of movies, drama serials, you name it! OMG OMG OMG, and it's all for free! No need to worry about being caught as it is like acceptable over here to just share everything, unlike our dear home. To share is virtue!

I am downloading like High School Musical 1-3, Liao Zhai Zhi Yi, House etc, which explains why my computer is like on 24-7 these days. All the movies and shows!! Haha, if you got anything which you want just let me know ok? I help you download then bring it back to you in my hard disk drive~ ;)



Yea man, so everyday's a learning day! With new things to explore and experience!! But work is also starting to pile up, therefore: so many things so little time!!! :)))

Today is the 1st time I attended a Dharma class, the 1st step I ever took to understand my religion more, the 1st attempt at knowing why am I a Buddhist. And I did not regret it the least bit, even though it means I most probably will not be able to travel around sight-see on weekends anymore. I am willing to give and take in this manner.

I do not know how to explain my emotions and thoughts when I was at the class. Was feeling pretty nervous and anxious before class as I did not know what to expect, how will it be. But as the lessons went on, I felt more comfortable being in the company of our advisor, a nun, plus the other Buddhists.

Throughout the 2-hour lesson, there were quite a few times when I felt the impact of the teachings deeply. I am not sure how to put it but just very touched and moved. I have no idea why but there were occasions when I had to fight back tears, some which did fall in the end. Feeling very paiseh, I tried to hide it.

After today, I am starting to see why my mother's getting more and more devoted towards Buddhism. It is something very beautiful, and something very closely in touch with our everyday lives. Really.

北大语言、文学、文化通选课（一）

1. 对于古人所说的数字，是虚是实，至今没有办法考察。但是可以知道的是：未必是真正的数字，因为古人有数字崇拜的习俗。
2. 在这个世界上有差不多4000-5000种不同语言，由于至今语言学者们无法达到共识，因此就只有这个预测而没有确切数字。
3. 我们所认识的字体和图书，是经过一段发展过程才成为今天所见的。字体的演变从甲骨文开始，图书的演变则从竹简开始。

I am supposed to be having lesson now. But I have been nodding off for my past 3 lessons that I figured it was no point going for the 4th but last one. I should not have slept so late last night but there were things to be done. Somemore the 3rd lesson ended much earlier than expected so the temptation to go back room was too great. And comparing walking back in the cold wind in the day with walking back in the colder wind at night, the former was just too good not to be taken.

1st lesson that I ponned, feels very uneasy, not like the times when I do that more than often back in NUS. Maybe because everyone here takes lessons seriously, they do not absent themselves for no reasons and they are always on time if not earlier for lessons to chop seats. But I guess the lesson was ok to pon as it was the same lecturer I have in Year 1 Semester 1 for CL1101E, the one and only lecturer by far who post everything on powerpoint then read off from them during lessons. So long as I lay my hands on the slides, things should not be too bad...

For the 1st time since I can remember, I am really taking studies very seriously. Worried if I do not understand what is being taught in class, stressed to want to study ahead and to prepare for lessons before I go so that I do not feel lost, desperate to constantly keep notes for the 8 modules which I am taking (plus 1 more which I am sitting in). I do enjoy going for lessons, I even loved some modules so much I do not feel time pass by during class. But I am concerned, and anxious... Hope things will get better as the weeks pass by, not worse...

Recently found a way to check my results for the past 5 semesters. I know this sounds so noob but I really had no idea how before yesterday. Looked through my results and my performance in the past... Because I have screwed it up so many times before...

Now, I need to achieve the impossible in my eyes for the next 2 semesters. I need to achieve an average of A/A+ for all my remaining modules during my remaining semesters. No room for mistakes, no room for failure, no more 2nd chance left... If I want to get 2nd upper honours and continue to take Masters before I go into NIE. I have to do it...

Just cannot help but think that I was the one who brought all these upon myself, I have been doing things without much proper planning and thinking through. I had given in so much of what I have in my University days to everywhere except my studies. I do not know if I should feel regret. I know in life you cannot have everything but is what I am having and losing now what I really want? I can no longer turn back time. Can I do it...?

When you are away from home, you will suddenly long for friends' concern when things are not going well or you are not feeling well. It happened, today. I had menstrual cramps as it came earlier than expected and I was so caught up with other stuff I forgot to abstain from cold stuff thus the pain was worse than previous times.

My deepest gratitude to friends who showed their concern and sorry if I caused unnecessary worry! Thank you to my room mate Woon who bought me hot sweet potato, it really warmed my stomach and made it feel wonderful. Thank you to Lee Han for offering hot milo to make my cramps better. Thank you to Yun Li and friend for the home-cooked prata like dish which made my stomach less queasy also. Thank you to Jackie, Liwei, Joshua & Mei Ling for asking me if I am feeling alright on MSN.

Even though I feel like crap, all the care & concern from friends and people around really makes me feel so much better. Yesterday during PMS, I even thought for a moment that I have become a forgotten lost soul in China. Today proved me wrong. :)