It was the first time I can ever recall to saying NO to people from a certain group. I used to feel that so long as there is a will, there is a way. I used to believe that no matter how hard the going, things will past by eventually. Tough time dont last, tough people do. But coming Year 4 with all the academic stuff really weighing down on me (I have essays due after 1st lesson!!!), I am starting to feel really constrained, really drained...

Have to learn to take care of myself. Many people told me this. Must learn to say no. Many people told me this too. All for the sake of my welfare. But in doing it this time round, I feel really bad and super duper reluctant. I hate this kind of feeling, at the same time cant help it also. You really cant have everything in life, I guess I have to slowly and painfully let go as circumstances no longer allow for me to be the way I was. I just have to adapt accordingly to it...